June 6, 2004
How I paid a high ... yes, very high ... price of _____ for my beliefs
You don't - you can't - understand the full impact of holding public office until former allies turn on you with sharp criticism and anger. Fortunately, with my experience as the weekly newspaper editor, I know what it’s like to have large numbers of people angry with me. Even then, it’s still possible to be surprised at what people will do, even in your own family. And that’s what this column is about.
Lucky me, I had my initiation into the pains of public office on the night of my swearing in, when we had to choose between two fine candidate for mayor. Since then, the city has been relatively quiet – I haven’t received a lot of angry notes, unhappy glances and sharp words. I know it’s coming. We have zoning matters to deal with, tough decisions about financing, and other difficult issues coming up. I write this column to acknowledge the anger directed toward public officials. Even at home. For one week in particular.
One thing I forgot to predict was what would happen when my family was unhappy with my vote. And that’s a doozy. It’s sort of funny … in a way … but you have to wade through the serious stuff in this column to reach that part.
The issue at hand was what the City Council should do in reaction to the Tacoma-Pierce County Health Department ban on smoking in public places. (This all happened before an appellate court recently lifted the ban, pending a trial) Several businesses complained that the ban scared away their customers. The folks who had the biggest grievance were the people who run casinos. When the ban was in effect, they had to prevent customers from lighting up in their casinos – but people can drive a few minutes and go to a casino operated by tribes not subject to the health department rule. The conventional wisdom, backed up apparently by the data, shows the tribal casinos gaining and the casinos subject to the smoking ban losing.
Now, let me be clear. I think smoking stinks. My dad smoked for many years, and we are pretty sure it was lung cancer that caught up with him (hard to tell – by the time he admitted to having any problems, his body had more than a half dozen ‘hot spots.’ We never did determine where it all began. What was the point of such tests, by then?). I used to fake coughing spells when I was a little kid, and my mother said that’s why my dad stopped smoking. I do not know how much second-hand smoke I was exposed to, or what effect that will have on my health in the future. I think smoking stinks.
But I have a big problem with a health department regulating what customers can do in a business. If they want to legislate away social ills, the health department would be better off spending their time on obesity. If the Tacoma-Pierce County health department wants to do something for future generations, they should dedicate their staff to portion control – put a health inspector in each restaurant to make sure that nobody gets a serving of meat larger than 6 ounces. And put a health inspector in each restaurant to make sure nobody orders milkshakes or supersized meals. Obesity is a huge epidemic, and costing us a lot as a society in health care expenses.
But, of course, the health department will not do this, because smoking is an easy target, but obesity is not. You have a right to overeat. And you have a right, heaven help your lungs and your life and your family’s life, to smoke. My position is that if you enter a business and it’s smoky and you do not smoke yourself, you leave. You vote with your pocketbook
Anyway, before the meeting, my wife and my 16-year-old daughter asked me what would go on at the meeting. I told them about the smoking issue, and how I was at least going into the hearing with the idea that we should somehow protest the health department’s heavy hand.
My wife’s eyes got wide. She’s a nurse on the labor and delivery floor at Madigan. “Do you know how much time I spend trying to teach mothers not to smoke?”
My daughter’s eyes got wide. “What about my friends who work in restaurants? Why do they have to be exposed to smoke?”
I told them the story about portion control, which I still consider to be pretty darn clever. If I have a chief weakness among many weaknesses, it might be my assumption that you can out-clever someone and somehow be ahead of the game. But nope, my wife and daughter still glared at me and still objected strongly to my stance. They stared at me as I went for the door.
After the hearing, the council decided to consider a couple of measures the following week aimed at protesting the ban or trying to do something about its effect on the casinos. Or both. A lot of good ideas were exchanged. Councilman John Arbeeny pointed out that the health department could have requited strong ventilation systems in businesses, in lieu of a ban. So I felt even better about my position. Later that month, we would vote to simply note that Lakewood observes federal clear air laws. It was symbolic.
I came home that first night, after the initial hearing. My wife asked how it turned out, and I told her.
“Well, then no ______ for you for a week.”
“What?”
“You heard me. No ______ for a week.”
I'm not gonna tell you what the ______ is, but it wasn't home-cooking. Now, both my wife and I work outside the home, and we have two children, so my first impulse was to fall back mentally on the old joke - that my odds of getting much intimate time are limited anyway and a ban would have little effect. I smiled (for the record, that may have been a very bad move). But Cindy was very serious, and making a point. I needed to listen. A ban … well, that was a first …
“But …”
“I may just talk to the other council wives and Helen’s husband about doing the same thing.”
Yikes. I figured I had better shut my mouth before getting the entire council in trouble.
For the record, our family got along just fine that week, but Cindy was quite serious about her pledge.
The upshot of it all is that I still feel like I did the right thing, although it is a difficult issue. I truly cannot blame Cindy for being angry with me. She’s seen the effects of smoking in her health care career. And together, we watched my father die. I cannot blame my daughter. I am haunted by the image of her nonsmoking friends coughing at someone’s second-hand smoke. I am glad the industry supports a ban on smoking around minors. But that does not solve her underlying repulsion about smoking: my daughter also watched my father die. It was a horrible time, for him and everyone around him.
But government cannot start legislating the social practices of customers. The ban is heavy-handed and the wrong way to end a social practice. It is certainly unfair to the casinos whose competitors do not have to abide by the ban.
I guess my message of this column is that just in case Cindy has been approaching other spouses, you should be nice to the council member that you run into – they may be more frustrated than you know. And for more reasons than you know.